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End of An Era

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It was inevitable given their ages, so I was somewhat prepared. Although it’s been over a year, my heart remains broken. It hurts more than I ever thought possible to announce that both Moose and Red have passed away.

Moose lost his battle with kidney failure on February 9, 2022. Sadly, it was also his Gotcha Day, having brought him home that day in 2003. He was in the end stages of the disease for a year and a half before succumbing to it at age 19. He remained status quo for quite some time, but he declined rapidly and the decision to let him go became obvious. I was the first person to hold Moose so long ago, and as I promised him, I was the last to hold him when the time came.

We worried about how Red would react to losing his buddy of almost 17 years. Red did better than we expected. In fact, for a while it looked like he was on track to outlive his brother. His appetite increased, and he even gained a bit of weight. His mobility had been more limited, but it was improving. His senior bloodwork was fine. We believed we had more time with Red, so it came as a shock when he passed away in his sleep at home. Maybe it was a broken heart, not wanting to go on after the loss of his brother. Red passed on April 6, 2022, exactly eight weeks after Moose.

It was one thing to lose Moose. Even though we anticipated it, we were still devastated when it finally happened. I had hoped he would see his 20th birthday, and for a long time it seemed possible.  Unfortunately, it wasn’t meant to be, as he left us nine months before.

Just when we were beginning to resign ourselves to a one-dog household, as awful as it was, we lost our beloved Red. Losing one was terrible, but two in such a short time frame, after so many years, was devastating. It all played out how we assumed it would, when one passed, the other would soon follow. I had hoped there would be more time in between, however.

I’ve titled this post End of An Era, because in a way it is. Moose and Red lived far longer than I ever would have expected. Eighteen and 19 is impressive for any dog. I miss them both every day. There are no more pills to cut up, no acupuncture appointments to keep. Yoga mats no longer line slick floors. The bumpers to keep the boys safely in bed are now stowed away.

My heart breaks every day. I cry for my boys, wishing we had more time, yet knowing we had longer than most pet parents are afforded, and for that I am grateful. I only hope they knew how much we loved them. They meant more to us than they’ll ever know, or that I can express in words. As I held Moose for the last time, I told him it wasn’t “goodbye.” It was just “until next time.” Goodnight, sweet princes.

Miracle Moose

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Almost a year has passed since my last post, and that is unfortunate. I intended to scale down from two posts a month to one, but never did I anticipate life events would have me stop altogether. 2020 was rife with personal tragedy, affecting both humans and animals in my life.

In October 2020 Moose was diagnosed with advanced kidney failure following a routine wellness exam that included a senior blood panel. I shouldn’t have been as shocked as I was. After all, he was a month away from turning 18, with a degenerative heart condition. Still, his bloodwork earlier in the year was normal, but a few months later that would change. Moose’s kidney values were off the charts. He was given several weeks to several months left with us. Even when you are somewhat mentally prepared for the inevitable, bad news still comes as a surprise.

We’re approaching October 2021 and Moose’s condition is status quo. We’ve heard that some dogs can live up to a year with Moose’s diagnosis. We’ve had to make some household adjustments given his new health issue, and I’m guardedly optimistic that he may see 19 in November.

Now more than ever before, Moose needs to have access to water at all times. This means that the dogs are no longer crated during the day while we are at work. They still eat their meals in their crates as a matter of habit, but food aggression on Moose’s part is no longer an issue as they are both elderly. There is a water bowl in the family room, which has been there for years since their mobility started declining. Our family room is sunken, and we didn’t want them troubled going upstairs into the kitchen with its slippery linoleum for water, even though yoga mats now line the floor for traction.

As for food, we have switched Moose from his prescription stomach food to a prescription kidney food. His appetite remains healthy so getting him to eat it isn’t a problem. He’s also fine with taking heart and thyroid meds in just about anything.

The biggest concession now is allowing the dogs free roam of the family and dining rooms when we’re gone. This means old blankets cover the couch. Even though the pups wear their man pants, accidents still happen. The coffee table is away from the couch, and a blanket is on the floor in the empty space between the furniture. Old pillows lay against the coffee table, buffering fragile dogs in the event they fall from the couch. Moose and Red can get down from the couch for water, but once they are down, they are not able to climb back up. The blanket on the floor cushions any falls plus acts as a place to snuggle since jumping on the couch isn’t an option for them anymore.

Last Christmas we took what we assume will be Moose’s last photos with Santa. It remains to be seen if he will see Christmas 2021 or his 19th birthday in November. While I’m optimistic, I’m not delusional. They are both very old dogs. While I would like to see Moose reach these milestones, I will not let him suffer to do so. The vet told us what to watch for when our time together is nearing a close. Until then I will savor our remaining days together.